Travel Reference
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“How long has it been since the fax was sent?”
“Yesterday afternoon.”
“We typically need eight hours to process a document and it's probably in the queue.”
“Can you check to see if it's been received?”
“You'll be notified as soon as possible. We receive many documents and you are not the
only person whom we are trying to assist. Thank you for calling Dialogo.” Click.
The following day's wait time on hold is a record 26 minutes. After putting me back on
hold again for yet a few more minutes while she investigates my situation, the service rep-
resentative tells me that they are unable to confirm that the fax has been received.
“How is it that you are not able to find it? The dealer has proof that it was sent to you.
Where can it be?”
“We are unable to confirm that it has been received.”
“You mean that it's gotten lost somewhere, and you have no idea where it is.”
“No, sir. Not at all. We are simply unable at this time to confirm that it has been received.”
I insist that this is not an adequate explanation, but my adversary will not yield an inch. As
I try to express my displeasure, she begins speaking as fast as she can to prevent me from
getting a word in edgewise, but I continue to speak as if she were listening to me, and so
we continue for a full minute, talking at each other without pausing for breath until I finally
tell her she's a bigger
chiacchierona
(chatterbox) than I will ever be and hang up.
***
Every few days my wife asks me cautiously and meekly when we'll be able to take posses-
sion of the new car, and I do my best not to bite her head off. This time as I come upstairs
for lunch, she sees the dark cloud over my head and knows better than to ask.
“I've had it. I'm going to switch to another company. This is driving me crazy. I'd rather
fight hand-to-hand in trench warfare than call customer service again.”
After lunch I search online and find an interactive site that promises instant quotes from
multiple vendors based on the parameters I enter. I plug in the car's vital statistics, the kind
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