Travel Reference
In-Depth Information
“Would you like a little more dressing for your salad?” “No thank you.”
“Have you got enough gravy?”
There was enough gravy to drown a horse. “Yes, plenty of gravy, thank you.”
“How about a cup of coffee?” “Really, I'm fine.”
“You sure there's nothing I can do for you?”
“Well, you might just piss off and let me eat my dinner,” I wanted to say, but I didn't, of
course. I just smiled sweetly and said no thank you and after a while she withdrew. But she
stood with a pitcher of iced water and watched me closely the whole meal. Every time I
took a sip of water, she would come forward and top up my glass. Once when I reached
for the pepper, she misread my intentions and started forward with the water pitcher, but
then had to retreat. After that, whenever my hands left the cutlery for any reason, I would
semi-mimeanexplanationtoherofwhatIwasabouttodo-“I'mjustgoingtobuttermyroll
now”-sothatshewouldn'trushovertogivememorewater.Andallthewhilethepeopleat
the next table watched me eat and smiled encouragingly. I couldn't wait to get out of there.
When at last I finished the waitress came over and offered me dessert. “How about a piece
ofpie?We'vegotblueberry,blackberry,raspberry,boysenberry,huckleberry,whortleberry,
cherry berry, hairy berry, chuckberry and berry-berry.”
“Gosh, no thanks, I'm too full,” I said placing my hands on my stomach. I looked as if I
had stuffed a pillow under my shirt.
“Well, how about some ice cream? We've got chocolate chip, chocolate fudge, chocolate
ripple,chocolate-vanilla fudge,chocolatenutfudge,chocolatemarshmallowswirl,chocol-
ate mint with fudge chips, and fudge nut with or without chocolate chips.”
“Have you got just plain chocolate?”
“No, I'm afraid there's not much call for that.” “I don't think I'll have anything then.”
“Well, how about a piece of cake? We've got-” “Really, no thank you.”
“A cup of coffee?” “No thank you.” “You sure now?” “Yes, thank you.”
