Travel Reference
In-Depth Information
case, he didn't make it home. There was no note when he was found in the morn-
ing, hanging from a tree in the front yard of a retirement home.
Was it a spur-of-the-moment thing, triggered by the mix of medication and al-
cohol? Or was it premeditated? We will never know. Some people may picture a
frail, quietly spoken person who was driven to suicide by self-pity, as if he was pre-
destined for such an end. But that wasn't Bruce. He was strong, outgoing and had
a zest for life and a humour that few are graced with.
'There was just no fear in him when he did it. There can't have been,' Neil said.
'He would have been feeling so alone. He knew how much it would hurt Mum and
Dad. He knew it … We've just got to respect his decision. It's selfish for us to think
otherwise. He is gone now, released from the world that probably tormented him.'
———
Two days before the funeral I sat motionless in the car. Beside me, Neil's face was
expressionless, eyes staring blankly through the windscreen. He turned off the en-
gine and there was only the rain drumming on the roof. A gusty wind whistled
through tiny cracks and rocked the car violently. Outside, a cloud had all but envel-
oped the mountain before us. It was Ben Rinnes, Bruce's favourite local peak.
'I just can't believe he did it, Tim … I'm going to miss him so much.' Neil's
words were almost inaudible.
'C'mon, Neil, you take my coat. We have to climb this mountain. That's where
Bruce will be, not moping around that coffin,' I urged.
The car doors slammed shut and the raindrops pelted down hard. Leaning into
the howling wind, we began to push upwards along a rough path. The horizontal
rain lacerated the open wedges of rock and threatened to pulverise bracken and oth-
er plant life close to the ground. It cut into my body, but I felt nothing. After half
an hour or so we stopped.
'Bruce loved it up here. This is what he lived for,' Neil said. 'I don't know about
you but I am absolutely soaked. We can turn back now, but I guess it doesn't make
much difference anymore.'
I was shivering, but it wasn't from the cold. Silently, we turned and trudged on.
Further on I removed my beanie. The wind caught the raindrops from my hair
and sent them flying. For no particular reason, we stopped again and turned to face
the direction we had come from.
'Neil … Neil! Look!' I shouted. But he was already transfixed.
