Biomedical Engineering Reference
In-Depth Information
that just before this happened but before I got pregnant in the fi rst place.
Why do we have a scan, why do we go through all of this (…) so I can
regret that I didn't think more about the consequences (Interview 1).
In the second interview, Mette again talks about her experience of being
in a 'vacuum', and how she thinks about the baby as defi nitely ill, or maybe
even dead, before the invasive test. Also after the confi rmation of normality
she could not feel happy:
METTE:
This has caused so much mental suffering, because unfortunately I
haven't been feeling very well after this (…) I haven't been able to feel
happy about my pregnancy, even though I feel that other people think I
should be happy (Interview 2).
Again, Mette argues that, after having her experiences, she had not quite
understood (nor did other people) that the scan is actually a way of fi nding
deviancies. If she became pregnant again she would want to be much more
prepared that things can happen, and will not always turn out the way you
have planned. Refl ecting on the months of the pregnancy, Mette talks about
her feelings for the baby:
METTE:
It was just like a swelling or something, I just wanted to get it over
and done with, I didn't think of so much as a baby, an individual, I can't
say that I had any feelings (…) no this pregnancy has just been so long
and diffi cult and I was not well (Interview 3).
The decisions a woman has to take while pregnant are here placed within
the context of motherhood or parenthood. As an expecting mother you have
an obligation to think about the baby that you are carrying. The notion of
hurting the baby in the womb is a theme that surfaces in several contexts
through the three interviews. When having to take a decision about the
invasive test after the high risk information, worries about actually causing
a miscarriage by having the test are deeply troubling to many women. Also,
you have to be a happy mother to give the baby a good 'environment'. If you
are very unhappy or stressed, this could endanger the health and wellbeing
of the baby in the womb. This all has to do with responsibility.
Discussion and concluding comments
In this study, we have addressed women's experiences of being at high risk
for carrying a baby with Down syndrome. Here, our focus is on women's
ways of accounting for their experiences and understandings as they are
confronted with a questioning of the normality of their baby after ultrasound
screening for Down syndrome, a question that eventually is found to be
