Tallinn to Fushiki - Grounded: A Down to Earth Journey Around the World - page 33

With the tremendous interest that the story of the Romanovs inspires all over the world, I felt sure the
good people of Yekaterinburg would try to monetize the tragedy—eking a living out of the city's major
claim to fame. Perhaps a slick Romanov museum with an expensive entrance fee and a well-stocked gift
shop? Or at least a row of pushcarts selling Anastasia T-shirts and coffee mugs? But there's none of this.
Even downtown, on the main Yekaterinburg shopping drag, I can't find a single Romanov-themed souven-
ir.
I still remember, very clearly, the first time I saw a 9/11 T-shirt for sale in lower Manhattan. It was no
more than six months after the planes hit the towers. Initially, I was shocked that anyone could want to
profit from something so awful. But after a moment's reflection, I found it oddly comforting: Tacky capit-
alism marches on, terrorists be damned.
It's been a solid ninety years now since the Romanovs died. Still, it appears the Russian people harbor
no interest in making a ruble off that family's misfortune. And my response this time is the reverse of what
it was that day in lower Manhattan.
At first, I'm dumbfounded that there's no exploitation going on in Yekaterinburg. Here's an obvious
tourist draw, and yet no one is milking it. Is it a lack of Russian entrepreneurial instinct? Did decades of
Communist rule permanently deaden the profit motive?
On reflection, though, I begin to see a certain nobility in the Russians' restraint. Perhaps it speaks to the
fundamental seriousness of the Russian soul. They've accepted capitalism, yes, but they refuse to give in to
its basest elements. They won't engage in a race to the bottom that culminates in selling nine-dollar T-shirts
commemorating violent deaths.
I feel sudden shame about the fact that I would have quite happily bought an Anastasia refrigerator mag-
net.
LATE that evening, we board the train again. Soon after it chugs out of the station, we do a couple of vodka
shots—it's become our routine as we work toward going fully native—and settle in for the night. The next
day, as we stare out the window, the passing scenery begins to shift. The forests get thicker. The towns get
bleaker.
Rebecca starts joking about abandoning me the next time we make a stop in a particularly grim-looking
village. “I'll push you off the train right when it's pulling away,” she explains. “ You won't have your pass-
port or any money. You'll just have to make a new life for yourself.” I look at her sideways. “Oh, don't
worry,” she reassures me, “you'll be very happy in Magnetogorsk. You can work at the blast furnace. You'll
marry a babushka. Plenty of cozy quiet time with her when the snows come.”
If we were to ride on the Trans-Siberian from Moscow to Vladivostok without ever getting off, it would
take about six and a half days. We're planning to make stops to break up the journey and to spend time in
some of the cities and towns along the way. Still, we'll be enduring a few fifty-hour segments on the rails.
For entertainment on these long stretches, I'm plowing through a collection of Chekhov short stories.
Meanwhile, Rebecca's having a brave go at War and Peace . (It was she who first taught me the joys of con-
textually appropriate reading material, and we've made it a habit ever since.) There's only so much reading
you can do on a multiday train ride, though, before you're forced to set your book down on your lap, rub
your eyes, and wonder: For fuck's sake, are we ever going to get there?
Around the World in 80 Days portrays Fogg's journey as a frantic, nonstop sprint. Admittedly, Fogg was
racing against the clock. (And the frenetic pace also suited Jules Verne's prose. As a contemporary put it:
“Jules Verne! What a style! Nothing but nouns!”) But consider Fogg's nine-day passage across the Atlant-
ic, which Verne describes in a few breathless, breakneck pages. Having now been on an actual nine-day
trip across the Atlantic, I can assure you there is nothing breakneck about it. The ship inches along through