Travel Reference
In-Depth Information
2
Finding Biff
Biff was a Norfolk terrier who came as a hand-me-down from my poor Mum, who had
suffered a massive stroke and was now living in a nursing home. Originally bred for showing
and much to his breeder's horror, Biff had sprouted a wonky tooth. He was quickly whipped
away from the kennel of 'perfect specimens' and stuffed into a rabbit hutch where he was
destined to end his days. On hearing about this, Mum took pity on him and he was added to
her collection of other Norfolks, five at that time.
Usually browny/fawn in colour, Norfolks are feisty little critters, often mistakenly used
as semi-lap dogs by their owners. In fact, they're great hunters, amazing guardians and very
tenacious. Biff, apart from his dental issues, was typical of the breed. He had the 'heart of a
lion' (a phrase which we sadly learned later to be very ironic) and never backed down un-
til completely squashed by someone much bigger than himself. Even then he always felt he
held the moral high ground and delivered the last yap.
There had been many occasions during holidays at Mum's house when, after yet an-
other bout of growling and blood-curdling squeals, she would calmly say something like,
“Beth, Sam's attacking Biff again. He's pinned him to the step in the hall this time, could
you please separate them before Biff gets killed?”
As I dashed over to sort them out, I would generally find Biff hanging off Sam's ruff
trying to gain better purchase as he searched for the jugular. In the end, they turned out to be
sterling friends, but it was for us humans to manage Biff's foibles.
Perhaps Biff's main eccentricity was his aversion to black trousers. For some ex-
traordinary reason he always attacked them, which is why I'd feared for the gendarme's per-
son and my liberty. We concluded this must have arisen from being badly treated at the ken-
nels, but it was a major problem for the wearers concerned.
Consider the number of people who wear black trousers. Now you can imagine the ex-
tent of the problem. For Biff, it was a vocational necessity to deal with any that came within
a reasonable distance, meaning postmen, delivery men, schoolboys - and anyone else wear-
ing them - were in mortal danger. As a precautionary measure, we tried always to wear blue
jeans.
