Cold Comfort - The Coconut Chronicles: Two Guys, One Caribbean Dream House - page 88

We gave Jane the information and asked her to order the unit and have it installed before
our return.
She called me at work a few days later with a “you are there” report.
“Guess where I'm sitting,” she said.
I was busy and not in my best mood.
“In a hot tub with your top off.”
“Not so much. Guess again.”
“In our bedroom.”
“Bingo.”
“And I'm guessing it's cool.”
“As a cucumber.”
“You're the absolute best property manager we currently have.”
“I'm blushing.”
“Don't forget to turn it off when you leave.”
In hindsight, maybe that last comment wasn't such a great idea.
☼ ☼ ☼
When we arrived in Vieques three weeks later, on one of the hottest days of the summer,
our new air conditioner started up willingly enough but it refused to gasp out even the tini-
est breath of cool air. We stood like morons underneath the rectangular box on the wall and
waited in vain for relief.
Nothing.
I dialed Jane.
“Remember that day when you said it was cool as a cucumber in our bedroom?”
“Sure,” she said, her voice already uneasy.
“Well, the cucumber just turned into a pickle.”
She took this in.
“The AC. You're sure you turned it on right?”
“As in, did we hit the on button?”
Exasperated sigh.
“Okay, did you try the reset button?”
“Yep.”
“I'll be right over.”
She tried everything. She called the man who had just installed the unit but unfortu-
nately he was off-island. She called another air conditioning guy, who came over and said
our coolant had leaked out.
“Can you replace it?” we asked.
“Absolutely,” he replied with a winning smile. “In two or three days.”