Travel Reference
In-Depth Information
Back on board the crew was barbecuing again, alas. It was a serious dilemma, as
Gaetano Notturno, the ship's restaurant manager, was also making pasta quattro fromagi
in the Harbor Grill. I decided I could have barbecue anytime. It was a wise decision.
At 4 p.m. the mystery authors did their last panel discussion of the cruise, “Finding the
Perfect Corpse,” where we explained who we kill and why, but not how. You can buy the
topics if you really want to know. That evening classical pianist Li-shan Hung performed
two shows, and I was starting to worry. One more day at sea, one day in Victoria, and then
I had to go home, where I'd have to relearn how to cook, clean and make my bed. Not to
mention walk, because I've developed a distinctly nautical roll to my stride when on
shore. I wondered if they need a full-time writer on board the Universe Explorer. I
wondered if Glenford, my room steward, would come home with me if asked.
Day 13: May 26
th
, at sea
Thank god, it was a cloudy day. You think I'm kidding, but just look at my schedule:
6 a.m. Work out. The
SS Universe Explorer
fitness center is one of the few places in the
world where one can ride an exercycle while whale-watching.
8 a.m. Breakfast. The omelet man is on duty. No more need be said.
9 a.m. Manicure in the Spa and Salon in preparation for dinner with the captain this
evening. I'm not happy about this dinner, I'd rather be whooping it up with Jay and Vickie
and Ellen and Sue and Brad. Instead I have to dress up, again, and behave myself. I com-
plained to Susie and Carrie, who were painting my fingernails, and they taught me how to
say 'kiss my ass' in Irish. I felt better.
10 a.m. Pick up white tags for baggage at Shore Excursions. I really am leaving the
ship. I want to cry.
10:30 a.m. The Lee and Pam Show, wherein our cruise director and WE Cruise's Dir-
ector of Operations tantalized us with other wonderful destinations in the ship's future,
like Nassau, Cozumel, Belize, Panama, Puntarenas, Puerto Quetzal, and Acapulco. I want
to cry.
11 a.m. Tsimshian song and dance man Wayne Hewson, who has been carving a totem
pole on the aft deck the whole trip, entertained us with songs and dances from his native
