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an even heavier burden, you see. It is so hard to see God's love in your
country.'
'Well, at least we aren't fishing babies out of litter bins. Not often . . .'
This seemed to raise her hackles. 'What is suffering?' she demanded.
'It is nothing ! But when suffering is sharing the pain Christ himself
endured, it is the most wonderful thing - a beautiful gift, you see. It
proves the love of God, who gave his son out of such great love. The
suffering relieves the sin - that is why it is such a beautiful gift.'
'That's pretty much the way the Hindus view karma, isn't it?'
'To be a saint,' she continued, 'means tearing away anything that is
not God from yourself - every false desire. You remove it and purify
the heart. You give up your own will - all the petty things you want
- and you live in the will of God.'
'But if your concern is the poor, there are so many contradictions
in your faith that ignore the real situation here, aren't there? I mean,
are you against contraception and abortion?'
She tut-tutted, the rosary zipping through her busy fingers with
noises like a hectic pool table. 'It's not 'for' or 'against',' she told me.
'No one should attempt to end life, because that is God's life in us.
He hears the scream of the unborn child killed without even a
chance of entering the world.'
'But there's no room for them in the world. Isn't that half the
problem you've been dealing with here?'
'Jesus tells us that the Father takes care of all the tiny things in
creation - the insects, the birds, the trees. So if he takes care of these,
how much more will he take care of us? God's greatest gift is life,
yes? And we are made in his image, yes? So why will he not take care
of us all? It is not for us to destroy life - it belongs only to God.'
'But if there was even just more contraception you wouldn't
have this appalling situation outside. God doesn't seem to be taking
that much care of his own . . .'
'It is not for us to decide who lives, who is born, who is not born.
These decisions belong to God, and he takes the responsibility. He
loves us all.' I asked how she felt about things like the Inquisition.
She kept harping on about love. It suddenly occurred to me that she
did not really care about the poor at all - except as a way to achieve
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