Travel Reference
In-Depth Information
people often stand up when someone new enters a room. People may not say thank you
quite as often as is almost habitual in Western culture, particularly between close friends or
to service people such as shop attendants. Saying “thanks” to a close friend can even some-
times be felt to distance your relationship because the obligation to do things for each other
is already inherent in the relationship. A person will also detect your respect or politeness
by the way you address them—
sh
ī
fu
for a taxi driver,
ā
yí
for a woman who's older than
you,
fúwùyuán
for a waiter, or
l
ǎ
ob
ǎ
n
for a male in charge of a shop or stall. The list goes
on, but it's helpful to have a few of the common ones in your repertoire.
For day-to-day dining, Chinese people are generally pretty easygoing when it comes to
etiquette. There are no obvious rules about eating with your mouth closed or talking with
your mouth full, about putting elbows on the table or slurping your soup. Dining etiquette
is more about the mechanics of the meal than about the way that you eat.
Unless dining at a Western restaurant, you'll find eating is almost always family style,
with dishes put in the center of a round table and everyone helping themselves. It can often
appear that people order gluttonously, and that at the end of the meal there is an excess of
leftovers. Some of this comes from the goal to ensure one's guests are well fed. Rather than
an empty plate being seen as compliments to the chef, it can actually be interpreted as hav-
ing under catered and leads to a loss of face for the host. Fortunately, there is a healthy habit
of asking for a doggy bag and taking home any uneaten food.
In more formal circumstances, such as at business dinners or family gatherings, there are
a few rules you should know about. The seat farthest from the entrance is reserved for the
guest of honor, and then the level of hierarchy decreases as you go around the table, with
the lowest on the ladder seated closest to the door. Ladies first doesn't apply here. The guest
of honor is the first person to dig in, and this then gives everyone else the green light. You'll
need to get used to the one menu per table custom. Traditionally the person taking care
of the bill also does all the ordering. It's best to leave it this way in formal situations and
happily be surprised by the parade of dishes that then ensues. For casual dinners amongst
friends, however, it is acceptable (especially in expat hubs) to prompt the waiter to bring
you additional menus.
