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'We'll try and work our charm in the pub,' I said.
After nine successful days of acquiring bikes, clothes, accommodation and countless
meals for free, we were looking forward to impressing our loved-ones with our skills.
'So your family will all be paying for their Sunday roasts, but you want yours for free?'
said the lady behind the bar.
'Yes, I know it sounds very cheeky. We don't have to eat the same as them. Any food
that you can spare, and we're happy to wash dishes or clean tables in return,' I said.
'We'vegotstafftodothat,'shesaidangrily.Therewasanawkwardshuffleoffeetfrom
our family behind us. Things weren't going quite to plan.
'Ok, I can probably sort you out with some bread and butter,' she said.
We sat and ate our bread and butter while the others all tucked into their Sunday roasts.
It was cruel, but the sun was shining and we were both sitting in a pub garden by the river
with our three favourite women. Things could have been worse.
'Here, I'm not going to be able to eat all of this. You boys have some,' said Ben's mum,
pushing a plate of roast beef in front of us. Ben looked at me as though he was seeking
approval.
'You eat it if you want, mate. I'm not going to have any, because it's still accepting help
from friends and family,' I said.
'But these are just leftovers that will go to waste.'
'Yes, but they are only leftovers because they are here having lunch because of us,' I
said, trying to downplay how much of a stickler for 'the rules' I was being.
'My god, you're hard work,' said Ben. 'So it would be ok for me to eat leftovers from
anyone else's plate in this pub, as long as they are not our friends or family?'
'Exactly.'
'He's a strict one, isn't he?' said Ben's mum.
'Tell me about it. It would be more relaxing going on a bike ride with Hitler. The other
day he was struggling up this big hill on his stupid little five-speed racer, panting away be-
causeit'ssuchacraplittlebike,andwhenhegottothetopIsuggestedheconsiderlooking
to upgrade his bike to something better to make the cycling easier. He just cycled past and
panted 'THIS WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE EASY'. It's like he wants to suffer as much
as possible.'
The entire table burst into laughter. I could do nothing but join in. I tried desperately to
think of a reason to justify my behaviour, but I knew Ben was right. I think a part of me
did want to suffer, in the sense that the harder the challenge that we faced, the more of an
achievement it would be to complete it.
Cycling from Land's End to John O'Groats is a great achievement in itself. Doing the
journey unsupported is even more of an accomplishment. Completing the trip without
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