Travel Reference
In-Depth Information
After about ten minutes, we pulled into a field in the middle of nowhere. We could hear
the distant chatter of voices and could make out the faint glow of a fire. We followed the
light of Rob's torch across the boggy and uneven field to where a group of about 30 people
were gathered around a barbeque the size of a pool table. It was the biggest barbeque I had
ever seen, constructed from three oil drums, and giving off an immense heat.
Rob introduced us to his parents who were both in their seventies and extremely nice.
They, in turn, introduced us to their friends, who then introduced us to theirs and within
half an hour we knew almost everyone.
After a while, some of the men began to put meat onto the barbeque.
'Can we help at all?' I asked.
'Well, yes, you can both be in charge of the barbeque, if you don't mind,' said the old
guy as he coughed on the smoke. 'There are a couple of pairs of tongs over there. Be care-
ful because it's very hot.' This was the understatement of the century. I could feel myself
carbonising as I stood there.
'Nice one, George,' said Ben sarcastically, when the old man had turned away, 'You've
got us a job cooking in a volcano. Just think, two hours ago we were roaming the streets
of Newtown, or whatever that place was called, looking for somewhere to stay, and now
we're running a barbeque in a field for a big group of old people while we wait for a wave
to come the wrong way down the river. How mad is that?'
'It's crazy. It's weird to think that if we had done anything differently today, like take
an extra ten minutes for a break, or if we had been offered a room at that George Hotel, or
if you hadn't suggested we speak to the onion stackers, then we would never have got to
experience this.'
'Yeah, or we might still be roaming the streets of Newtown.'
'Newent,' I corrected.
'You knew what?'
'No, Newent. The town is called Newent. Not Newtown.'
'Well, whatever, I wouldn't want to spend the night roaming its streets.'
'Here you go, boys,' said the old guy, who had returned with two cool-boxes. 'We've
got burgers, sausages, ribs, chops, steaks and chicken legs. You might as well cook it all.
We don't really want to take any of it home.'
There was enough food to feed Gloucestershire.
We set about our task of cooking the biggest quantity of meat that had ever been seen in
one place. I dread to think of how many animals must have died to create the mountain of
bits that we were faced with.
There was no light other than the coals themselves, so it was virtually impossible to tell
if the meat was cooked properly. We managed to borrow a miniature LED keyring from
one of the old ladies (yeah, she was down with the kids). This worked well, but only if
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