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objectively about the vision. In my experience I have identified two powerful
tools that minimize the urge to take negative responses or situations personally.
For this to be effective it requires me to focus on the “mission” or objective of
my leadership activities rather than me personally. The two points that have
guided me are as follows:
1.
“It's not about me - it's the mission”
Explanation: What I'm leading is for a cause that is bigger than me and is
about the mission. People's acceptance, support, and engagement directly
benefit the mission, and conversely their failure to support it negatively
impacts the mission.
2.
“Don't own other people's issues”
Explanation: People's responses to me do not necessarily reflect on
me, my vision, purpose, or relationship with them. Their responses are
often a manifestation of their experiences, perceptions, and state in life.
Determine whether I've effectively communicated and interacted regard-
ing the issue, and, if not, make an effort to engage them again. Make sure
to ask them to stay focused on the “issue” in their response and to clearly
articulate all responses relevant to the issue. No matter how they respond,
don't own or make it about you.
Along these same lines of personal issues we have to be very careful about
bringing up the gender issue as a primary reason for pointing out bias in our
organization. While our intent is not to let others forget that we are women, at
the same time, we cannot focus on this as a major aspect of leadership. Remem-
ber, you are not a woman fighting for a cause; you are a leader who happens to
be a woman.
Former head of the US Environmental Protection Agency in the Clinton
Administration, Governor Christine Todd Whitman, provides a stellar example
to illustrate this point. In 1990, when Governor Whitman was running for office
against former basketball star Bill Bradley, she frequently tried to get him to
engage in a formal debate with her. His office would ignore her calls, and after
many attempts she decided to use the “gender card” very effectively. She went
to the media and played up the fact Bill Bradley would not return the calls from
her office regarding a request for a debate and she believed that he did not want
to debate her because she was a woman. This brought an immediate response
from him and he agreed to face the debate. The reason why he was not respond-
ing earlier may not have been the same as the one she propagated, but when she
played this card his response was prompt. This is an example where the gender
card was used appropriately and strategically, and it provided the desired results.
CONCLUSION
There are many things we can say to summarize this chapter; the essence of
this chapter is to recognize your talents, utilize your resources, and capitalize
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