Travel Reference
In-Depth Information
THE NATIONAL PSYCHE
The truth of the Iranian national psyche lies in
the gap between reality and Western perception.
Before the revolution, the West's experience of
Iranians was drawn from the country's elite that
travelled and came abroad for their education.
The revolution turned that image on its head.
Suddenly Iranians were scary, hysterical people
chanting 'Death to America', covering their women in black chadors, and supporting a fun-
damentalist regime that apparently took their society back to the Middle Ages.
Let's dispel these images. Despite the Islamic government and Sharia laws, Iranians are
not frightening people. They are generally warm and welcoming to a degree that can be
embarrassing to Westerners. That Iranians take their role as hosts very seriously comes
from a genuine desire to put others' needs first and please where possible. In daily life this
manifests itself as ta ' arof, the Iranian system of courtesy, which can be a minefield if un-
known but for travellers means you will be treated with politeness wherever you go.
The area of land that is Iran has been continuously
inhabited by a single nation for longer than any oth-
er land.
TA'AROF
At the end of your first taxi trip in Iran, there's a good chance you'll ask the driver 'chand toman' (how many to-
mans?) and he'll reply 'ghabeli nadari'. His words mean 'it's nothing', but the taxi driver still expects to get paid.
This is ta'arof, a system of formalised politeness that can seem confusing to outsiders, but is a mode of social interac-
tion in which everyone knows their place.
Despite the apparent contradictions in the taxi, you'll soon learn that ta'arof is more about people being sensitive to
the position of others than routine politeness. So for example, an offer of food will be repeatedly turned down before
being accepted. This gives the person making the offer the chance to save face if in reality they cannot provide a meal
(they will stop offering after the second or third time). A good rule is to always refuse any offer three times but, if
they continue to insist, do accept. When a shopkeeper, restaurateur or (less often) a hotel manager refuses payment
when asked for a bill, do remember that this is just ta'arof - don't leave without paying! If you accept an offer that is
in fact ta'arof, the shocked look on the vendor's face should soon reveal your error.
Ta'arof also involves showing consideration of others in your physical actions, so try not to sit with your back to
people and expect to be delayed at doorways as Iranians insist that whoever they're with goes through the door first
with repeated 'befarmayid' (please). Be prepared for small talk at the beginning of any exchange, as the health of
every member of your family is enquired after. Returning this courtesy will be greatly appreciated. Also be prepared
for questions considered personal in the West, such as your salary, marital status, why you don't have children and so
on. This is quite normal. Steer away from politics or religion unless your Iranian host broaches the subject first.
 
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