Tokyo in Depth - Tokyo - page 29

29

in Japan with the Japanese syllabic script
(katakana) written on the reverse side.
The proper way to present a meishi
depends on the status of the two people
involved. If you are of equal status, you
exchange meishi simultaneously; other-
wise, the lower person on the totem pole
presents the meishi first and delivers it
underneath the card being received, to
show deference. Turn it so that the other
person can read it (that is, upside down to
you) and present it with both hands and a
slight bow. Afterward, don't simply put the
meishi away. Rather, it's customary for
both of you to study the meishi for a
moment and, if possible, to comment on
it (such as “You're from Kyoto? My brother
lived in Kyoto!” or “Sony! What a famous
company!”).
SHOES Nothing is so distasteful to the
Japanese as the bottoms of shoes, andthere-
fore shoes are taken off before entering a
home, a Japanese-style inn, a temple, and
even some museums and restaurants. Usu-
ally, there will be plastic slippers at the
entryway for you to slip on, but whenever
you encounter tatami floors you should
remove even these slippers—only bare feet
or socks are allowed to tread upon tatami.
Restrooms present another whole set of
slippers. If you're in a home or Japanese
inn, you'll notice a second pair of slip-
pers—again plastic or rubber—sitting just
inside the restroom door. Step out of the
hallway plastic shoes and into the toilet-
room slippers and wear these the whole
time you're in the restroom. When you're
finished, change back into the hallway
slippers. If you forget this last changeover,
you'll regret it—nothing is as embarrassing
as walking into a room wearing toilet slip-
pers and not realizing what you've done
until you see the mixed looks of horror
and mirth on the faces of the Japanese.
GUEST ETIQUETTE If you are invited
to a Japanese home, you should know it is
both a rarity and an honor. Most Japanese
consider their homes too small and humble

for entertaining guests, which is why there
are so many restaurants, coffee shops, and
bars. If you are lucky enough to get an
invitation, don't show up empty-handed.
Bring a small gift, such as candy, fruit,
flowers, or a souvenir of your hometown.
Alcohol is also appreciated.
Instead of being invited to a private
home, you may be invited out for dinner
and drinks, especially if you're in Japan on
business, in which case your hosts may
have an expense account. In any event, it's
nice to reciprocate by taking them out
later to your own territory, say, to a French
or other Western-style restaurant, where
you'll feel comfortable playing host.
If you're with friends, the general prac-
tice is to divide the check equally among
everyone, no matter how much or how
little each person consumed.
In any case, no matter what favor a
Japanese has done for you—whether it was
giving you a small gift, buying you a
drink, or making a telephone call for
you—be sure to give your thanks profusely
the next time you meet. The Japanese
think it odd and rude not to be remem-
bered and thanked upon your next meet-
ing, even if a year has elapsed.
OTHER CUSTOMS Don't blow your
nose in public if you can help it, and never
at the dinner table. It's considered disgust-
ing. On the other hand, even though the
Japanese are very hygienic, they are not
averse to spitting on the sidewalk. And
even more peculiar, men often urinate
when and where they want, usually against
a tree or a wall and most often after a night
of carousing in the bars.
THE JAPANESE BATH
On my very first trip to Japan, I was cer-
tain that I would never get into a public
Japanese bath (sento). I was under the
misconception that men and women
bathed together, and I couldn't imagine
getting into a tub with a group of smiling
and bowing Japanese men. I needn't have

2